Tuesday 20 Feb 2007

It’s not unusual (or is it?)

It is not very common for a gaming console to sell with an included game; it’s not very common at all. I’m not talking about after the console has been around for a while and then they decide to throw in GranTurismo or Mario Kart: Double Dash to help boost sales, I’m talking about the inclusion of a game at system launch. In my research I have only come across one other console that has done this, which ironically enough was another Nintendo system, the NES which came packaged with Super Mario Bros.

When it was announced that Wii Sports would be packed in with the console as a free game for the European and American launch people started to doubt. They took a look at the screenshots and read about what the game featured and they were not impressed, I too was skeptical about this “freebie” that looked to piggy-back on the success of the Wii. True, the game did have some appeal in that it boasted realistic (to a certain degree) sports games such as tennis and bowling that would take full advantage of the Wii Remote and the Nunchuck attachment. It could be a very good showcase, or demo if you will, of the new system. A way for gamers to get a real feel for the controls without the need to buy a game on the same day as they get the console.

But all those thoughts are behind me now, yes, because now it was my time to step up to the plate (quite literally) and stake my claim as a pro in these five sports.

Tell me about L33t Skillz…

Each game featured in Wii Sports (Tennis, Boxing, Baseball, Golf and Bowling) tracks your skill level. When you defeat opponents your skill increases, or if you do especially well in a game it could effect the amount in which it increases, this also applies for when your skill level decreases when you are defeated in any of the aforementioned games. Although the opponents start off easy, they get progressively harder as you bulldoze your way to 1000 skill points. Once you have raised your skill level to 1000 you will be considered a Pro in that event, but you will have to keep playing well to maintain that title as it can quite easily be taken away from you if you should fall below the required level.

The best way to review this game is to break it apart into each sport, analyze them, put them all back into one blender, blend for five minutes, bake in oven for 15 and then see if the muffins come out tasting good or not, because there are some very displeasing ingredients, but sometime these tastes can be overpowered by chocolate chips and the like.

Tennis – AKA guaranteed next day physio visit

It is very surprising just how similar Wii Tennis is to the real thing… falling and grazing your knees; painful tennis elbow; sweat falling into your eyes with a sting, ah yes, these are but a few of the joys of tennis, and now you can experience these joys from the “comfort” of your living room. On a more serious note though, this game is very physical. Yes, you can cheat the system by giving little wrist jolts, but that won’t take you all the way through to being a Pro. The only way to play this game is by standing up, giving powerful forehands, deceptive backhands and of course match winning smashes.

Despite what people say, the Wii does not pick up what angle you are holding the racquet at when you take your swing, rather it picks up when a swing is taking place (usually the increased speed monitored by the accelerometers) and the height of your “racquet.” The aiming of the ball is all time based, hit the ball early it will give an acute angle, hit it late and the ball will rebound at an obtuse angle. Simple? Well that’s what I thought, and to a large degree the first couple of opponents you face are just that… simple. But as your ranking goes up the opponents get more l33t, and you will find yourself working a heck of a lot more to win the match.

Baseball – AKA The Back Breaker/Neck Twister

Thank god the developers decided to cut this game down to just 3 innings per team. I don’t know if it’s just me that doesn’t like baseball as a person, or if the game is just really, really slow (I’m talking about realspace baseball at the moment). It could also be that in South Africa we don’t play baseball, in fact the closest we get to playing base ball is watching reruns of Angels In The Outfield on a Saturday morning. Fortunately for everyone in the world, the Wii incarnation of the game is actually quite a hoot to play.

One player controls the batting team and the other player (or the CPU if you’re alone) controls the fielding team, and you guessed it, when your team is out the positions are changed. The pitching is a bit random at times and it seems that it doesn’t matter how you throw the ball but rather what button on the Wii Remote you are holding down whilst you try and make the Remote move from point A to B almost instantaneously. You can perform a range of different types of pitches to try and outwit the CPU (very impossible) or your friend (very possible). The batting is done quite well, if you time your swing just right you can actually control where you want the ball to go. In reality this is useless because if you are being that precise you are almost always certain to be caught out. I find the best way to play is just to swing the bat as wildly and as fast as humanly possible and pray to god that it connects with the ball enough to give you a home run, or even better an out of the park.

Bowling – AKA How I tore my hamstring

Bowling is probably one of the most fun games out of the five, it also just happens to be the most random too (this is probably why the girls like it a lot, they actually win sometimes). This is probably the best bowling simulation ever made for any electronic machine ever. The console picks up your bowling style and even accounts for minor wrist movements when you are throwing the ball. It is so accurate that if I were to go down to the local bowling ally and shoot some lanes I bet I would be making the exact same mistakes and have the exact same bowling style. I believe Wii bowling can actually improve your realspace bowling scores simply because once you start to play Wii Bowling…. You… Just… CANNOT…. STOP!!! It has that illusive “Must play again to beat my previous score” effect on people that come into contact with it, so if you are a known sufferer of this illness, stay far, far away.

Wii Bowling literally brings a bowling ally into your home, and you will find yourself doing the exact same movements you would usually do at the real thing. Unfortunately though that, combined with the “Must play again to beat my previous score” effect, can lead to serious muscle damage, especially around the calf, thigh and groin areas. Yes, I said groin. Don’t ask me how this happened, all I know is I played a ton of Wii Bowling and the next day my… area was sore. “Nintendo, if something happens to my Johnson because of your stupid game you can expect some law suits.”